Shi Guang Ji

And yes, I've finally come back to this almost abandoned blog of mine; after more than 3 months since my last post in Redang. Hmm, all the nostalgia.

Anyways, the Redang trip was awesome. Something that I truly felt what a perfect class trip is, at least, for the time being. Sporting bunch of friends and great activities. Cool. As for the pictures, I guess Facebook has replaced the era of people posting pictures on blogs. Well, as you can see, this revolution is revolving around:) And so does my many pictures that I suppose to post them all here.

*

During these few months in KL, I guess I finally came to understand life better. In a practical way. And before that, I would like to categorize the multitudes in 3 categories:

• You are born lucky, blessed and have all the opportunities coming to you to lay down the success pavement in your life.
• You are just like everyone else out there, living a conventional life, having a conventional job from 9-5 and working your way thru the success ladder-which usually ended up not realizing your dreams coz the world is unfair and it really is.
• You are below average and you practically suck at everything and no one takes pity on you though it seems like everyone cares for you. And yes, this sucks very much.

Regardless of which category you belong to, you still strive to aim for the best ain't it? Though sometimes you know that the outcome will be 99% impossible of what you wanted. As I can see, some people rise, rise and fall, stay stagnant or just below the line always.

I believe that what belongs to you will be yours and vice versa. And it's true. When you try too hard to gain success the shortcut way, it's as good as betting your life by throwing it as a dice in a Vegas roulette. I admit that I myself am seeking for shortcuts at times, but just to realize the virtue of being down to earth and realistic at the very end of the day.

When you live in a city, you see your life clearer in a way which tells you that in most things, it's either you play by the rule of the game or you die. And in a way you are blinded where illusions in forms of hedonistic lifestyles found you.

I guess in many events of our lives we wish to borrow a time-machine('shi guang ji' in chinese-as you can read from my title) to amend the little or big error you made in life which will possibly be a decision that affects your entire life. Correct?

As for me, I wish I could go back to the night before my dad passed away; and to make perfect the last moment I was going to have with him on earth---making the best presentation of his birthday present(which was 4 days before he passed away), making the last best speech and 'good night daddy' that I was ever gonna say to him. Sounds familiar doesn't it? To those who have gone through what I had and hope for that 'just one more chance, one more time' to happen just for that very one time for us.

Mankind has emotions and it is an immortal feature we will never be without.

Perhaps I'm just too lonely out of a sudden although I'm in fact very contented with my life now. Having almost everything that I wish, and having things that I don't even need.

To that, I wanna thank mummy and my beloved aunts for making my small lil' Apple family complete--my macbook, ipod touch and iphone.

Next on Apple wishlist: all the ipod nanos(to match my clothes), macbook pro and imac>.<

That's all for tonight. Currently listening to Lifehouse's Storm and Yo-yo Ma's Sonata N. Good music.

Nights ya' all.

Given

We were given: Two hands to hold. To legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find. 

~Anonymous~

Euphoria

And to my amazement, Redang Island is connected(to the internet). At least, in the resort I'm staying in. Good=)

Here I am blogging after a humid but totally fun out day. Well, what else more can I say? It's only naked honesty when people say Redang rocks and it of course does! One thing for sure is that your don't get to perform activities you get to do here often or daily unless you're a beach boy or girl who stays in an island.

Up to now, everything is great especially when you have the best group of college mates who are crazily fun to be with in everything you do here!

Personally, the best part of this trip is last night's clubbing; on the beach! It's absofuckinglutely fun and sexy I tell you! People who had experienced beach clubbing will know. It's exactly like those Mexican/Hawaii beach movies we watch with people drinking and partying along the beach with a DJ fuming up the crowd to dance. Exactly like those last night!

Surprisingly my friends and I do agree that the DJ was somewhat good. The mixture of his music was a little similar to MOS's style. And how good is that?!!! We always love interactive and talking DJs don't we?^^ Hui Ting and Ee Von drank beers and I got free Martini from a friend over there:) But sadly, the beach club closes at 12am due to consideration of the resort guests who are sleeping. Aww>.<

Anyway, now I understand why MOS is named Euphoria coz' the sense of euphoria does come to you when you found the perfect clubbing experience and beach clubbing is totally my thing now!

*

I also do realize that I describe my trip as if clubbing is what I suppose to do and enjoy here=.= Well, apart from that, snorkeling is really good especially the session today in Marine Park where corals, fishes and colourful sea creatures are in abundance. Food wise, it's only okay but I quite like the pina something(forgotten the name ady) cocktail that Johnson ordered last night. Nice mixture of fruits and rum!

And we also took plenty of pictures. Love Jason's Sony DSLR. So perfect for taking great shots and nice sceneries. I'm gonna blog the nicest of the pics out after this!

My first semester break is unexpectedly fun! Gonna check out and tour Kuala Terengganu tomorrow and off to Genting with Bryan and family over the weekend! Voila! 

While life is short, nice moments are rare too. We just gotta savour every second of it with delightful satisfaction!~

Dust.Events.Beach

Just last week, or so I think, Jason made a cute remark saying that my blog is dusting(berhabuk). I giggled and thus remembered myself having a blog. Oh yes=)

And coincidently I have an amount of time with nothing in mind to spend now; in Wangsa Maju's KFC, waiting for William who's in the clinic. Here I blog then.

*

Over these months in KL, I've been through so much of events, be it physically, mentally and of course, literally. And they are either awesome or fun. Yes:)

The next big thing will be this Thursday night, where Akon is coming to MOS and I gotta go for free. Oh, did I mention that I can bring along four persons too? And yes for free as wellXD Haha. *Confetti pumping high in the air*

BUT, I will be going to Redang tonight. So I can't and ain't going. It's fine with me though, coz' I'm not attracted much nor impressed with Akon. Spending a night of BBQ on the beach and playing the craziest games ever with your beloved bunch of college bimbos/bitches is so incomparable to a night with Akon. But you people who are Akon's worshippers must be so disappointed. Lol. Same thing will goes to me if it's Leehom or Jay^^

Anyway, William is here and I gotta go. I am determined to post my Redang pics or you guys please spam my cbox to ask me do so. Have fun ya all.

Ciaoz~

Shiok

I love driving in KL. 

And So For Us It'll Be Like...

Flying high on the wings of the sparrow,

We'll see the world below,

Looking at the clouds,

Spreading like a magical carpet,

For just the two of us,

On nights of pain,

I'll cover you with warmth,

On sunny platters of joy,

We'll reap with laughter,

Oh, the heartbeat of my soul,

Come crush with my heart within,

Rounding a diploid of love,

A sweet memory.

To Study The Complexities Of The L Word

You know, I believe each blogger has the affinity to forget about owning a personal blog at some time and comes back blog-flooding like never before. Like a mental vacation on blogging.

And I begin to see a number of my friends and I being a part of this lane:)

It must be either you're bored of blogging eg. thinks that blogging is so lifeless and blames oneself for being so lifeless to blog all these while, or your environment changes you.

Just like me I thought. Since residing in KL, I haven't been blogging much nor I feel the vibrant urge to blog. I do have the desire to blog but I just couldn't bother to take a step further to commence it. And thanks to the absence of internet connection in my living place.

Well, this whole feeling of coming back gives me a sense of belonging and memories; feeling like I am brought into my childhood lair where I used to hide myself during moments of pain, bitter, happy or frustrated. Oh, I'm so into it now;)

*

Sitting in my college's icy cold quiet library now, thoughts just flew in my mind waiting for me to pin them all down.

To be honest, a true sense of belonging has never came into my life before. Faking everyday of the happy me is just but the facade of trying to please everyone and to make each day happy to live. Yet, rains of tears pour heavily in my heart whenever I'm dispersed being alone.

I realize I am the person who turns weary, wild and curious whenever I'm alone, and having nothing particular to do.

And for this reason the adage phrase that says "an idle mind is the devil's workshop" is so true, so true.

For the past years, and perhaps for years to come, I'll be yet to master the philosophy of the greatest power on earth: Love.

For every new beginning, there seemed to be hope, but only to be dismayed by disappointments and despair. This seems to happen to me, but yet I, alongside with many pilgrims of love never cease to climb on the road to search an almost perfect love; coz' nothing is perfect in this world. And perfections can only be determined by each individual's expectations.

But you know, A, you have broken down my walls with the strength of your love. How am I suppose to stop? I can't. And when I can't stop, I gotta find a way out. A way to reach the balance and equality for the love we share.

Please let me gain the knowledge of of this great power, God. I really need it and A has become the air that I'm breathing now.

It's stupid to see how people obsessively fallen in love and turn into an item of paranoia to the person you love. But what is sillier is to realize yourself doing so when you're blinded by the very own person you're loving.

True enough that I'm giving you pressure but that is one thing I can't stop doing, to love you. However, I must strike a consensus between us to prevent things getting jeopardized.

I'm telling you that you've now officially come to be the first priority in my life. And how can loving you be enough for me? It'll never be.

I love you,

And for the very reason,

I'll hold you tight when I could,

Embracing every sweetness we can share,

Through the ups and lows,

For you're my sanity that keeps my life going.

Because I Suppose...

"...our lives are defined by opportunities, even by those that we've missed."

Rush

It's obvious that I'm so freak dead to blog nowadays.

And now? I'm in my college's resource centre(for the first time) having nothing particular in mind to do. So I was thinking why not put in some lines in this dry page:)

.....I really don't know what to say. Is it that either my mind's too occupied or I'm totally blank?Both I guess.

Recently, I started out a new phase in my life. A total different schedules, lifestyles and responsibilities. A beginning which I hope will fork the better out of me.

One particular thing that I'm still boggling about is the perfect choice of course that I really want to do.

I got replies from UPM and UM last week. Both for music. Something clarifying to me.

Something ambitious. Something sentimental. A silhoutte.

After much of critical thinking, I say I'm going to continue with law. Now that I love it and I really know what I want.

Well, sometimes the best thing for you ought to pop out at the most amazing time isn't it?

Music will still continue to be my passion in life, but I guess there'll be so many avenues where I can project my desire in it. Yeah.

And the bottomline would be that I won't go for both unis' auditions. But instead I'll do music as a freelancer which I suppose it'll make me happy. Coz' to me stuff that gives me total freedom of expression towards it makes me happy; instead of it being a commitment you gotta follow. True.

*

Here, I'm gonna put up a situation and think:-

Your supposed 'virgin mary' lover flirts and omitted crazy love-forbidden sins behind you. He/she was supposed to be the one who had always gave her 2 cents thought to you preaching on how sacred and faithful love should be. You are changed by his/her enlightment much earlier to be a very faithful, loving and caring bf/gf of your lover.

After you actually found out on what he/she did eg. creating intimacy with others, having sex outside(I know premarital sex is rampant today but I mean promiscuity here), sold himself/herself to the values of materialism, you questioned him/her.

He/she(of course) doesn't want to admit a single thing but instead went on with his/her usual lovey-dovey stints on you. To melt you or any sorta stuff alike.

And then you found out even more unbelievable omissions of your lover in the future.

Q: You confront him/her one day. On every single thing he/she did. He/she has no choice but to admit upon the proofs that you presented to him/her. He/she asked and pleaded for the oh-so-romantic "one more chance, baby. Just one chance will do." Will you forgive him/her?

I'd say absofuckinglutely NO.

Compassion and trust is totally two different things for me. Here.

I would give her a second chance IF, at the very initial first time I confronted her, she repents. I mean repent. She can deny my accusations and I'm fine with it but she gotta repent and stop doing shits.

But even after the second or third time, she is still treating you a fool. And when confrontation with proofs came, and there she hoped she can dig a hole and bury herself from you by there.

I'd make my decision that way due to a few resonings:

-How can I trust someone like her further on?

-Although there'll be a slight possibility that she might turn over a new leaf and be faithful to you, but would I take that thin risk? I think we shall protect our hearts.

-IF something like this happens twice, I'd be a total failure. Figure that out.

On the compassion side, yes I'd still have compassion for her. Let's say one day she got in some deep shit trouble or dying in front of my own eyes, I'll still help her. But I might not trust her anymore.

See the relevance here? So what would you do if this falls on you?=)

Anyway, like always, this never happened to me. I just like to ponder on crazy stuff. That's all. But hey, it's quite good to think over unexpected events and figure a way to handle if it really comes isn't it?

Life always teaches us to be safe than sorry afterall.

Okay, topic ends here.

*

Movies that I've watched since last month:

Yeah, I know the last two movies on top are abit outdated but i like them so much! I mean for A Walk To Remember. Uber meaningful and touching la. Sungguh jiwang sekali!

Well, movies that I've yet and want to watch are:

-Watchman

-K-20

-Shinjuku Incident

-Coming Soon

-Friday The 13th

-He's Just Not So Into You(though Michelle said it sucks)

-The Ugly Truth

*

I dyingly want to have something interesting to blogabout man! This is just too sick, the way I'm blogging now.

Need to go home now. Then to Sunway Piramid at night.

Till the next post. I'm so boring=.=

Nail Justice

I'm on the bus back to awesome Muar now. Going online on the bus for the second time thanks to celcom broadband. Lol.

*

 Well, I was very much astounded by what has just happened minutes earlier. And to the urge I think I should blurt my uneasiness out. There are two foreigners behind my seat row, and I guess they are most likely to be Vietnamese. Whey got on the bus, the conductor charged them RM20 each for the ticket instead of the standard RM16(KL-Muar) for every busliner company. Not only that but both of them were shouted at like animals. I really couldn't bear the feeling of pity and guilt that I actually did nothing to their appeal. 

Well, I could and would have to do to fight for their rights. But argh, I don't want any troubles as well so I was thinking just drop that idea off la.

Also been warned by mum not to create troubles in public(like the one I did last week I Pudu which I won, oh I haven't tell you guys about that one) again.

Just like what Lord Acton said:

"Power tends to corrupt and absolute power tends to corrupt absolutely".

When a nation has got a lopsided government, so why can't the people in its governance be tyrants and create truancies everywhere? You see the whole point? So I don't see the total blame to be put on the bus conductor. 

A parent has a responsibility to bear on a child's upbringing and he/she couldn't probably said "Oh, it's not my fault. My son's an asshole coz he's an asshole. Certainly got nothing to do with me."

No right? The same thing applies here. We all live on a larger organism that bounds to reflect whatever that we do. Hence the theory of natural karma and the adage of "Like father like son" prove on well.

The world is getting worse for sure.

In Ardent Need Of A Laser Printer

Going back to KL tomorrow.


Kinda reluctant and tired. Lol. Of the fact that I hate walking down the sorry streets of Pudu and the nearby KL slums(where my college is located in one of them; kua kua). Well, still oklar, just annoyed by the irony that our capital city streets are in such ill conditions. I'm not trying to be cocky but that's obviously blatant kay? Comparing to vicinities like Mon't Kiara and Damansara. Right?

My college is along Petaling Street btw=)

On a brighter side, this means colourful 'sceneries' from the weirdest walks of life, instant (fake goods)shopping with awesome offers, nicey foods(not minding the cleanliness/hygiene), convenient 24/7 public transport(not minding the cleanliness/mothafucka taxi-drivers), and the nearness of all the hotspots on Kl(considering that we aren't tourists, these 'mercu-mercu tanda' doesn't seem appealing to you and I, right?)

I'm such a complaint ass. Shoot meXD

*

Anyway, I'm staying in USJ. Aunt's place somemore. Which makes everything nice and awesome for me. As in all the living conveniences and comforts. PTL for that! I haven't brought much of my stuff over in KL yet coz' I'll do so little by little when I come back to Muar every week. 

Yes, every week coz' I still have some commitments in my hometown; ranging from stuff like my violin and tuition classes, church album, SOB(some other business) and err, sleeping on my own bed. Heheh.

Well, I gotta at least do this until my students finish taking their ABRSM exam and SPM. Hectic shit though, but I guess that will be okay coz' I'm deem to go wet and overspent like crazy if I stay in KL during the weekends.

I'm planning to work part time in KL as well though(haven't let anyone know about this especially my family so don't tell them. Shhh!) because:   

• I'm already accustomed to a working life. Yes, pretty weird but urgh, working people will know what I'm trying to tell la.
  
• Spending your own earned money is one of the best thing to me. Contentment, proud of your own achievement and ability , freedom, all in one. Geddit?
  

I'm just worried that my family wouldn't allow me to work on coz' my mum has been very negative towards me working during my two Form 6 years coz' for certain people, working while studying=bad results outcome. Which is quite true la, but screw it la.

Anyway, I also realized that I could easily survive on my own coz' I do have certain skills/talents that will throw me a job instantly almost wherever I go. I'm not trying to be lan-c but that's the truth la. Deal with it.

 So yeah, I already have quite a number of options of jobs to choose from in KL. But this time, since it's KL, I would want to try out something new and fresh to me for an exposure to learn more stuff. Urm, that's like, for example ovum donating. Lol. Just kiddin' But I swear I saw that job ad can! Rm3500 per session. Girls, anyone wanna? Nah, click here.

I'm more interested in business. And also acting/script writing/mag articles. I'm offered 3 acting role in a chinese drama can? But extra roles la. Lol. And I don't think I wanna accept it. Coz' I need to either act as a sissy high school gay boy who runs away from home, non talking part boyfriend, or a cafe customer. Sienz! Yes I'm unrealistic. So then you go accept these roles yourself wanna?=) Hope there are better opportunities coming to me than these ones la. Haha.

Well, I'm kinda bored with music for now. Perhaps because of the tedious hideous pressures/working hours. But still, I'll continue to write songs la.

Anyway, what's on my mind now is: 

"Argument makes a relationship interesting, but yet understanding makes a relationship last."

Screw it to people who doesn't understand that coz' I'm pretty tired to maintain a passive relationship. CCB. Like wtf man, I'm your bf so I need to take charge of every single fucking thing? And worse still, all my efforts that I put in are worse than talking to a deaf person. Coz' at least a deaf person will want to try and comprehend what you're trying to tell him but for certain people, your words and actions are super invisible to them. 

Oh well, damn geng la these people. They want you to be initiative as their lover but they just stay silent even if you do so. So how? You expect people to read your retarded mind and know what to do next in order to please you? Oh please. Get a yardstick and stick it in your arse.

Anyway, I'm saying this in a general mode. Totally not pointing to whosoever. Just that I'm really appalled to see some individuals treating their lovers in such absurd attitudes. Those were just the least of what I wanted to say anyway.

*

On a totally different side note, I need a laser printer asap. Are ya gonna buy one for me?=)

No? Well, at least you gotta get yourself one if you don't have one. 

I've come to know how much in demand of pages that I will be needing to print out in a law degree course. Like tons. And still counting.

Doesn't matter my hyperbole but a laser printer is what you need for long term massive printing. A laser printer would be more pricey than an inkjet, but likewise, it's more cost-saving for a long term run. Why?

A normal 3in1(printer-scanner-copier) inkjet printer costs around RM250 whereas a 3in1 laser printer is around RM480. Roughly double the price of an inkjet. Well, look at the ink maintenance.

A usual black&white inkjet cartridge costs around below RM45(ori price, not your usual pirated inkjets) and it prints like not more than 200 before it fades out. And an inkjet cartridge does not necessarily print out the same amount like it always does coz inkjet cartridges dry up easily when it's not frequently in use.

Okay, comparing to a black&white laser toner, it costs around RM180 and promises a standard amount of 2500 pages per toner.

Now you do the math. So is a inkjet printer costlier than a laser printer? Yes it is.

But don't buy now. Along with your IT gadgets. Wait for another 2 weeks. For PC Fair. For better options. Lol.

Gotta sleep and rush-pack tomorrow morning. Have a nice day you peeps. 

Chill out!~